Hammer Mill Days

Where did I put my html tags? I thought I packed them with my socks, but they don't appear to be in there. WFT, man.... getting a new home is always such a pain. No, friends. We have not abandoned the abandoned Cheney Hammer Mill. That would be something you might expect from the department of redundancy department (of redundancy). We have, however, abandoned our old web site and moved into a new one, designed by, I don't know, professional web designers... as opposed to my sorry ass, who threw together our last site with Front Page and some tweezers ... not to mention some cracked old photo manipulation software. Yeah, that's right. Do I have to draw you a picture? (Actually... that would have been better than what came out of that software.) Anywho... out with the old, in with the new. We've been using Wordpress for Hammermill Days (and, earlier, Notes from Sri Lanka) for over five years, and so we thought, hey, why not build the whole freaking site using the same sof...

Another challenging week for those who value sanity. Let's see what we've got in the old political grab bag: Go West. Channeling Joe McCarthy, congressman Allen West name tagged the entire Congressional Progressive Caucus as members of the communist party this week. Interesting choice. Is this dude trying to lead us back bravely to 1952? Because if he does, he will not be a congressman at the end of that process. Black people effectively did not have the right to vote in Florida back then, let alone represent their constituencies in Congress. Do go there, Congressman! Stay in this decade, at least. Memento Santorum. Well, this is disappointing. Just when I was getting used to the knock-down drag-out fight that was the Republican primaries, they come to a screeching halt. My guess is that someone got on the phone to old Rick - time to pack it in, old man, and let Mitt start kicking at his general election strategy. Perhaps Mr. Friess made the call himself - suggested Rick hold...

How much does the moon weigh? I don't have an answer to that, for chrissake. What am I, a freaking scientist or something? Go ask Mitch Macaphee. What? He told you to ask me ? Mother of pearl... Oh, hi. Was wondering when you would drop by. Not the best time, as I'm sure you've surmised. We're working on our proposal to the Gingrich campaign to be their official liaison to the Moon people and their special counsel on all matters Moonly. This is an ambitious move for Big Green - certainly as bold as our attempt to glom onto the W. Bush campaign and presidency way back in 2000 (the distant future... the year 2000...). That started with something as humble as sharing an interstellar tour bus with the man himself, but resulted in our brief but fruitful installation into the corridors of power. (We still have some of the fruit from that little sojourn, though it's a tad ripe now.) Right, so anyway ... back then it was clear that Bush would be the nominee. This time, it...

It's official: if you get pulled over for an out-of-date inspection or soft tires ... or perhaps nothing at all, you can be strip searched. Thank you, Anthony Kennedy. Thank you, George W. Bush. Why George W. Bush? Because he appointed a right-wing chief justice when Rehnquist had to step down in 2005. In truth, I should blame voters in the 2004 election for reelecting a right-wing imbecile to the presidency - one who would be there to appoint Scalia clones as needed. The Roberts appointment was particularly crucial in that Supreme Court Justices - who are imagined to be somehow magically apolitical - always seem to delay their retirement until the presidency is held by someone who shares their ideological world-view. Because of failing health, Rehnquist would have retired in 2005 no matter who won the 2004 election. Ergo, that election was our last opportunity to shift the balance of the court back from right-wing extremism, and we basically blew it. That's as it may be. But t...

Hey, turn off the water when you're done in there, okay? Hello? Mitch, is that you? Matt? Lincoln? Where the hell is everybody? Oh, right.... they've gone to a clambake. Or so they said, anyway. I think they just want to get the hell out of this drafty old Hammer Mill, and who can blame them? Not I, my friends. Still ... someone has to mind the store. Perhaps you suppose that Marvin (my personal robot assistant) could handle such a simple task as guarding the mill, but no... much too complicated for his tiny mind. No, it takes real intellect, acumen, and chutzpah to keep this abandoned mill running up to par. And it there's one man under this roof who can.... hey ... did I leave the front door open? MARVIN?! Okay, well... we all need help, right? That's what bands are all about. Otherwise hapless musicians, huddling together to ward off the elements, keeping the home fires burning. Personally, I think they're all irked at me for being such a jerk during our last pod...

This was a week when national health insurance was equated with cruciferous vegetables; when purveyors of deadly gun violence played the victim and had the law on their side. What a week, eh? First, the Affordable Care Act being considered by the gang of nine (robes division). There are a great many things that might be said of the judicial theater we were all treated to this week, but from my perspective - a limited one, to be sure - they boil down to the following points: Health Care: Still Not A Vegetable. This is one of those vacuous, tea-party type arguments that has been thrown around since the Affordable Care Act (ACA) was considered by Congress. Jesus freaking christ on a bike, Justice Scalia ... no , health care is not the same as freaking broccoli. You can live your whole miserable life without eating a single floret of broccoli, but god damn it you will certainly end up in a hospital at some point, and someone is going to pay for it. And no, it's not a cell phone eithe...

Hey, what the...? Did I sign off on that? Are you sure? Well, I guess you would know better than I. Wouldn't you? RRRrrrrr.... Face it, we've got bad quality control here at the Cheney Hammer Mill. Was a time that not a single hammer went out of here with unsightly flashing or a splinter out of place in their ironwood handles. Not so with Big Green, it pains me to say. We are not perfect - ADMIT IT TO YOURSELF. It's just because we've got irons in so many fires. Too many spoons in the stew. Eleven toes on each foot. I don't know - you pick the metaphor. I've got work to do. Nah, see... Marvin (my personal robot assistant) posted our March episode of THIS IS BIG GREEN, our podcast, before I had had a chance to listen to it. We could be saying ANYTHING, for chrissake. If we had reputations or integrity, we could lose either (or both). There are some advantages to general slovenliness and moral degeneration, but I've only just thought of one of them, so.... th...