Friday, November 18, 2016

Inside November.

Drat. Scuttled by a solar flare. That was a serious oversight on the part of that person we put in charge of planning our interstellar tour. Who was that again? Let's see .... oh, right. It was me. Well ... no ice cream for me tonight.

Okay, well ... looks like we're having the interstellar version of a rainy-day schedule today, but instead of coloring books and tunafish sandwiches, let's break open the November episode of our THIS IS BIG GREEN podcast and see what's crawling around inside. Ned Trek 30: "The Deadly Queers". This thirtieth episode of our Star Trek parody is based on the classic episode "The Deadly Years", in which the Enterprise command crew is affected by radiation that quickly turns them all into raving geezers. In our version, radiation causes the Free Enterprise crew to become progressively more gay - a fate worse than death for our hyper-conservative, free market, confederate flag-waving heroes. There's a lot of tasteless swanning about and gay sex references that none of us are proud of, but hey .... satire. Extra special appearances by Senators Lindsay Graham, Roy (aka "Roy-toy") Blunt, and Bernie Sanders.

Songs: Embedded in Ned Trek 30 are seven new Big Green songs. These, as always, are rough mixes of recordings that will, in some version, appear on a future album or albums yet to be determined. Here's what we've got:

Tinkerbell Neocon - Medium tempo guitar-driven rock duet sung by Perle and Doc Coburn. This one gets stuck in my head, quite frankly, so beware!

Seven songs?Fairy Dust - Another dirge by Sulu (the one original cast member that is somehow part of this "next degeneration" version of Star Trek). Very moody little number.

Oklahoma Mo - A slightly gay Doc Coburn nod to his cow town oil-patch upbringing.

Space Fandango - Romney song that should have been a tango (and may still be one day), all about Stephanie O (the captain's Don Ho). Ummm ... hilarious.

Let Me Go - The android Nixon does this over-the-top sixties rock ballad about needing to go to the can. I don't think we're breaking new ground here, but it's certainly the first song I've ever done that places having to take a piss in the context of mid 20th century presidential history.

Potato Salad - Ned song with kind of a sixties vibe. No, it doesn't make any sense, even in the context of this ridiculous and borderline offensive episode of Ned Trek, but here it is anyhow.

Spanking Machine - Pop song, sung by Willard, that harkens back to his boarding school days.

Put The Phone Down: Matt and I kvetch about the Trump election, rail at a useless media and an even more useless Democratic party, and look ahead in dread at what outrages lie before us. Laugh a minute.

POTUS, inc.

After shock comes anger. I don't think I'll move on to negotiating - anger seems about right, particularly with the news emanating from President-Elect Trump's transition team. His closest adviser will be the spiritual leader of one of the alt-right's most popular web sites, Breitbart, so you know this is going to be a volatile time from the standpoint of those issues Breitbart tends to report on. Jeff Sessions as Attorney General, perhaps? That would certainly put black people's minds at ease. I think Trump may be considering Cap'n Crunch for secretary of the Navy. Sounds like a good pick, though he's rumored to have a crunchberry problem.

Meet the Trump cabinetOkay, so what will Trump's victory mean from a policy standpoint? Well, if he's anything remotely true to his word, we are likely to see the most reactionary policies ever advance in our lifetimes passed through congress and signed into law. This is not just about Trump - this is about a extremist Republican party that becomes even more virulent every time it returns to power. We had the Reagan-Bush cycle, which was far to the right of anyplace we had gone politically since the Great Depression. Then there was the George W. Bush presidency, shot through with neocons and a decidedly more autocratic approach to governance, powered by the disaster of 9/11. Now: a Republican electoral trifecta - president, senate, and house, all in the hands of an even more reactionary strain of this very destructive party.

What will that look like? Well, we have a pretty good idea. Look at Wisconsin when Blind Scotty Walker took the reins. Look at North Carolina when Pat McCrory was elected (though he may have lost this year, we'll see). Paul Ryan, Mitch McConnell and Trump will do something very similar - put together a pre-baked raft of reactionary programs into a series of bills, pass them over any objections, and sign them into law in the first few weeks of the ass-clown in chief's administration. They will also do everything they can to lock in their gains, passing voter i.d. restrictions, confirming ultraconservative justices at various levels, and attacking the remaining institutions of the liberal-left: public sector unions, Planned Parenthood, and so on. That's what we're looking at, and judging by Ryan's various activities over the past year, they are likely to use budget reconciliation on a lot of this legislation. My guess, too, is that the filibuster will be disabled or destroyed quite early on, as well.

So hold tight, people. We are going to have to fight like hell to preserve what ground we can. Elections have consequences, as we will soon see.